Happy, Not Perfect- How To Battle The Instagram Comparison Game

instagram comparison

Happy, Not Perfect. How To Battle The Instagram Comparison Game.

nashville blogger

nashville blogger

nashville blogger

nashville blogger

nashville blogger

instagram comparison

instagram comparison

instagram comparison

Oversized T-Shirt | Ivory Skinny Jeans | Snakeskin Sandals

My New Year’s resolution was to lead a more intentional life in all aspects, including with this blog. (You can read more about that HERE.) I’ve found myself straying a few times, but I’m back and committed to filling it with purpose, intention, inspiration, and my truth. The good, the bad, and the ugly.

I started the blog as a strictly fashion space. I was no longer working as a stylist, due to having my babies. Being away from them for those long hours no longer made sense for me. This was an outlet to still “style” and have a creative outlet. For that reason, the fashion will always be a part of it for me. It’s what I get most excited about still. It’s just not all of who I am, or the direction I wanted my brand to be. Sharing some fashion inspiration with some soulful food for thought seems more fulfilling and truthful for me.

In this crazy day in age, social media has become omnipresent in our lives. There are so many things I absolutely love about blogging and being a part of the blogging community. However, I find myself struggling with playing the Instagram comparison game. It’s a struggle for everyone, but in this industry it is amplified. “How does she have more followers than me?” “More “likes?” “Work with that brand?” “Always seem to have it together?” “Have that new bag?” The list is endless.

The other day, I attended a panel where Mary with Happily Grey and Rachel Zeilic spoke. These women were inspiring, to say the least, but there was one line that Rachel said that I just couldn’t get out of my head. She was speaking on the affects that growing up in the social media age has on young children and teenagers. The emotional and mental toll it takes on them, and an app her friend was developing to combat that called, “happy, not perfect.”

Happy, not perfect. Happy, not perfect. Happy, not perfect. I’ve taken this and made it my mantra. I find myself repeating it in my head over and over when I start to catch my self sliding down the slippery slope of the Instagram comparison game.

Do you catch yourself trying to make every little detail perfect? I do. Or I try to make it appear that way. It’s exhausting. Perfection can be the thief of your happiness. Don’t let it.

We put the importance of “perfection” (whatever we conceive that to be) above the importance of happiness. How crazy is that? I’m breaking the cycle. Now I do believe that you can have everything you put your mind to and want out of life. BUT, the constant need for perfection is simply unhealthy.

How To Battle The Instagram Comparison Game

1. Gratitude. Keep a gratitude journal. Say things you are grateful to have or be out loud to your significant other or kids. Trey and I sometimes lay in bed and tell each other things that we are grateful for and things we would like to achieve. Pretty powerful!

2. Take a break. Spend a weekend IG free. Put all devices up for dinner time. Go on a vacation and leave your phone in the hotel room. It’s harder to do than you may think, but so important. (I spend significantly less time on social media on the weekends or at least one day of the weekend.) Put that attention you would be giving your phone into your family or a hobby.

3. Talk yourself off the ledge. Keep in mind, bloggers are paid to essentially create “ads.” Now, I for one, NEVER promote something I would not truly used or haven’t tried and love. BUT, once I do, I stage things in a way to capture attention. No my living room isn’t always perfect. (Even though it appears that way in an IG photo.) HECK NO, my hair and makeup doesn’t look like this walking around my house every day with a baby on each hip. (Thank you Cali Jeffries for making this mama feel like a million bucks for this STAGED photoshoot for this post though!)

4. Repeat this mantra to yourself. “Happy, not perfect.” What makes you happy? Put your focus on that. Attack this world and go after all the things you want, but don’t lose your happy spark in the rat race.

Big thanks to everyone that reaches out and appreciates the staged pictures that take an immense amount of time and effort and also accepts the real life behind the squares.

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  • Reply
    Angie Simmons
    April 23, 2018 at 1:19 am

    Needed to read this!!! So hard to not get caught up in the comparison game. I have fallen off doing my gratitude journal and am committing to getting back on it after reading this. Also love the idea of one day a week social media free. Thanks for the amazing post mama! Xo

    • Reply
      Beau & Arrow
      April 23, 2018 at 2:16 pm

      Angie! You are a gem. I’m glad you could relate. I love the gratitude journal idea. Writing it down is even better. I’ll need to start doing that.

  • Reply
    April 23, 2018 at 2:39 pm

    Totally needed this on this Monday morning. All of your words hold so true!

    xx, Danielle | http://www.pineappleandprosecco.com

  • Reply
    April 23, 2018 at 3:12 pm

    I just love this post! I did a similar one last year about the Instagram comparison game and what I found interesting is that even as bloggers (KNOWING the hard work and time 1 picture can take) we still get wrapped up in the comparison game. I love your mantra “happy, not perfect” and def plan to share with my readers too! Thanks for the inspo girl!!

    xo, Ilse

  • Reply
    April 23, 2018 at 3:39 pm

    Thanks for sharing this! Happy, not perfect is such a great reminder. It can be so hard not to compare and have those thoughts about why others are growing but not you. I truly think it is important to have gratitude for those accomplishments and to take a break, just like you said.

    xo, Lydia

  • Reply
    April 23, 2018 at 4:01 pm

    This is such a good post!!!! I love “happy not perfect”!!!!


  • Reply
    Ruthie Ridley
    April 23, 2018 at 5:45 pm

    Something I have struggled with so much!! It’s hard when all we do is scroll!! Thank you for sharing this!!

  • Reply
    Oh to Be a Muse
    April 23, 2018 at 11:01 pm

    Yea, it must be hard for young kids in this social media age. I’m happy I didn’t have to grow up with that. Also, I love your beach waves!

  • Reply
    April 24, 2018 at 2:16 am

    I agree with taking a break. Social media is one big advertising tool, and it’s make believe. If it starts making me angry that’s when I know I’ve lost my grip on what’s really important.

  • Reply
    Laura Leigh
    April 24, 2018 at 2:21 am

    Something I definitely struggle with and know so many others do as well. Thank you for sharing this gal! Being happy is most important, not perfect!

    xo Laura Leigh

  • Reply
    April 24, 2018 at 5:17 am

    I absolutely love this post and needed to read this! I love that mantra!! Comparison can really be the thief of joy- I will be keeping this mantra in mind!

    cute & little

  • Reply
    April 24, 2018 at 5:53 pm

    Such a great post! This I struggled with when I first started blogging and it took over my life. Once I realized that it was hurting more than helping, it became easier to let it go! Thank you for sharing and reminding me to take a step back:)

    xoxo, Hannah

  • Reply
    April 26, 2018 at 12:40 pm

    Love this post! I think all of us bloggers stress too much over Instagram – it can definitely have it’s pros and it’s cons but I try to remember why I started blogging in the first place, because it was fun and a creative outlet- never to have a million followers. We just have to stay true to ourselves!

    xo, Kristina

  • Reply
    5 Birthday Activities To Do In Nashville - Beaus and Ashley
    July 16, 2018 at 6:39 pm

    […] time over everything. I let go of the comparison social media game. (You can read more about that HERE. ) Concentrating on gratitude, building other people up, and positive thinking will take you much […]

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